Surrender

God specializes in creating something out of nothing where we are willing to surrender everything.

The Extravagant Gift

Recently (well, 2 weeks ago now) the Lord pointed out that I have a problem with receiving extravagant gifts.

He used an example in the natural (a gift my husband gave me), to illustrate a parallel in how I have been treating my spiritual gifts, one in particular. I repented, so that He could heal me. I repented of shame and the "fear of man" (people). I didn't think I had those 2 issues, but He showed me, in the context of my increasing discomfort and inability to truly receive a beautiful gift that my husband gave me over a year ago.

I originally received the gift with great joy, but as I began to use it, all these other feelings would come. I kept the gift hidden from most people. I even began to express my doubt, to the giver, about whether I should have the gift.

God exposed the root of the problem: I was afraid of how others would feel if they saw what I had, I was afraid of being judged. I was more afraid of what others would think, than what I was doing to my husband's heart. My husband delighted to bless me with an extravagant gift, because his love for me is abundant and extravagant.

Just like God's love.

God said to me, “You are afraid of being judged for it by man, more than you are afraid of how I'll feel in your waning enthusiasm.” (If you love your husband, and his heart, enjoy the gift he gave) He was paralleling that with the spiritual gift He (God) has given me.

My response was: Because it is a thing, a rich, extravagant thing, and there are poor everywhere.

He said, “Yes Magda. There are poor everywhere. Will you keep Me hidden, then, as well?”

The penny drops.

God said (and my husband would agree), “I have given it to you with great joy, I want you to use it without shame.  Shame has been robbing you of the blessing the gift was intended to be.”

How often does satan use shame to rob us of blessing and joy?

At every opportunity.

Like today, when I wanted to cut holes in a paper bag and put it over my head.

How freaking lame is that?

Well. I guess that's it then. I've been sitting on this post for a couple weeks, until I wrote my 'Shock Of Age(s)?' post. See? There is a God who answers even pathetic “X”yr olds with too many mirrors.

The bright, white, Light revealeth all.

Carry on... and don't forget, God gave each of us shiny stuff.  Don't get robbed.

(Don't believe me?  The day I determined to act on this revelation and use the gift without shame, something fell on it and dented it.  A freak accident?  No way man.  That was a vindictive act in direct response to my decision.  An effort to, once again, steal my joy.  I see it as a battle scar.  They happen, and I'm still alive to tell about it.)

The Faithfulness Of The Paperboy

So I asked the Lord this morning how He wanted to speak to me. I then poured another cup of Starbucks, dark roast, into my thus branded mug as the words, “faithfulness of the paperboy”, crossed my mind. Nothing else was coming, so I was, like, really? And began to think about sitting outside on the front step, on this gorgeous morning, with my Bible. Then thoughts of, “rain or shine, the news gets delivered” and an image of my Macbook gets implanted in my mind. I imagined sitting in front of it, one sentence typed: The Faithfulness of the Paperboy. Period. Ugh.

Then a question pops in, “Do you have faith that I will give you the words?” Yes. Yes I do. But the subject sounds boring, to be honest, so I'm thinking (hoping) it's not You. Then I hear, “Obedience. Faithfulness. The paperboy delivers the newspaper rain or shine, because people need to read the newspaper”. Ahh... There is a flicker coming on in my lightbulb now, just a little bit. I go to my Macbook and start typing what I just typed and then it starts coming in.

It goes like this...

Do you know that every time the paper is to be delivered, it is, whether sun or rain or cold or heat? It may be delivered in a different style to adjust for weather and for the paperboy himself, but it gets delivered because people need to get the newspaper. Some people read the whole thing through, some only read the sections they enjoy, some don't read it at all because they assume they won't enjoy it or need anything from it. Regardless of what gets done with the paper once it's delivered, the paper gets delivered.

Do you think the paperboy enjoys his job? Perhaps on days when the temperature and weather co-operate and on the days he gets paid the fruits of his labour and when he is commended or awarded by his boss for a job well done. But many days it is tiring, cold, wet, and the only things that keep him going are the hope of a promise fulfilled. Even more than his commitment. It's the promise that keeps him going. The promise that comes from his boss. The promise that this will be a good thing for his resume, a stepping stone to something bigger... (be faithful with little and I will put you over much, rings in my brain). What keeps him going does not originate with him, nor does it affect him alone. It relies on others and it impacts others.

Promise and hope. If that can be crushed in your enemy, you have won the war. Who is your enemy? And where is he crushing your hope and trying to destroy your promise? Where is your hope and what is the promise? Who gave you the promise and what does it whisper about your destiny that you have invested hope into. Where are you under attack? It is deeper than your soul. It is your spiritual DNA and your soul and body are designed in harmony with that spiritual DNA.

You have a destiny to tread upon the enemy of your promise and hope, not just for your sake, but for all the ones you are called to deliver to. Persevere. Draw on the support systems that you need to see that the mission of why you are here, does not miss you.

You are significant. Any voice that says otherwise is lying.

Do what it takes to be the fulfillment of the promise that is stamped into your spiritual DNA. Life is short, life is also full of second and third and fourth chances. Get over yourself. Humility is a huge weapon in your arsenal, that is too often underused. Stop blaming others, that cripples you, and hinders others. Reach out for what you need to find out what your promise is, how to get back on track. There are people waiting for what you will deliver.

How many have passed up a [paper route] because it was boring, tedious, beneath them, didn't pay enough or uncomfortable? How many leaders, and movers and shakers today, had paper routes when they were young? Don't despise the day of small beginnings, because the character it builds is a foundation on which a greater structure can be built. That greater structure is your promise. There is no fast track. But there is hope. Do what it takes to get back on track.

Your promise is waiting.